The train wreck, as I called it, 

was 50 years in the making.

Everyone, damaged goods from the onset

Sideswiped and derailed by divorce

As Mom was handed the throttle

To some runaway train 

Dad bailed, saving himself, 

leaving the rest of us, shellshocked

Chugging steadily down the steep decline

Towards some unknown destination

Ever hopeful, trying to right the train

Buried eyes behind stacks of romance novels

And tears that consumed her nights

She was drunk with depression and gloom

Teetering on the edge

I jumped from that train years ago 

watching safely from a distance

Wanting them to jump too, just leave it behind

But they clung too tightly

As the train careened out of control.

Drug use, alcoholism, apathy, depression

All took a heavy toll   

Spanning decades, the cars buckled and popped 

Leaving a pile up of woes and debt

The innocent, robbed of their inheritance 

Victims becoming the perpetrators

in cycles handed down through the generations

As the train came to its final rest, 

The twisted and broken wreckage

Reeked of debt, disease, decay, 

and unimaginable misery 

The passengers carted away to die alone

And alas, my mom, left broken and hopeless

being the final pin that joined the family

surrendered control…severing that ancient connection

and I, with a sigh of relief, 

viewing the wreckage from afar,  

Left only with survivor’s guilt, and ghosts.