I had my cast taken off just the day before I caught the red eye flight to San Francisco that Dad bought for me. Near the rear of the plane, I got a window seat next to an older black man with white hair. He said that it was his very first time flying in a plane. Surprised by this, I suggested that he book an earlier flight in a window seat on his return trip so that he could see what the country looked like at this altitude. He said he was going to Oakland to attend his daughter’s wedding and I told him I was going to see an uncle that I had not seen since I was a teenager. He warned me that San Francisco was full of homosexuals and I assured him that I was quite capable of taking care of myself. If he only knew, I thought. I closed my eyes and tried to  get some sleep, but I don’t think I slept much.

I awoke to the voice of the captain announcing that we were making our descent into San Francisco. It was something like 4:15 in the morning and I felt groggy and my legs were rubbery. The older black guy named Mo started to fidget in his seat.

“So we gettin’ ready to land huh?”

“Yeah, in just a few minutes.”

“This is a lot faster than taking a bus. My ears are all stopped up all of a sudden,” he said.”

“Here, pinch your nose and blow like this.” He did as I told him and then his eyes lit up. “It worked. I can hear much better now. Thanks.”

As we came in for the landing it felt a bit rough.

Mo turned to me breathing hard and said, “Oh Jesus! that ‘bout scared the crap out of me!”

I laughed and said it scared me too, being that it was a rather rough landing. After most of the people disembarked from the plane, I helped Mo get his bag out from the overhead compartment. He wished me good luck and lumbered down the aisle.  I slung my backpack on my back and followed him. As I walked past the flight attendant and the pilot, I felt a cool breeze that woke me a bit. Past the bouncy ramp, I entered the airport and looked around. I saw Mo hugging some younger thin black woman and a tall hunky black man that towered above them. I scanned the room and saw Andy standing near the windows much like I had remembered him as a kid, yet he was a bit heavier and a bit grey. He recognized me and waved. His eyes lit up the same way that I had pictured him. An older version of the ruggedly handsome man known as Uncle Andy who had traveled the world and was admired by all of us kids. I smiled as he held up his big arms and rushed towards me.

“Oh my god how you’ve grown Travis!” he said as his bulk surrounded me in love. “Last time I saw you, You were just a skinny scared kid about to get married. Now look at you all big and buff.”

“Wow Uncle Andy! It’s so great to see you again. I’ve got so much to tell you.”

“Well all that can wait. I bet you’re hungry and tired. Let’s get you back to my place so you can get some decent sleep. We can talk all we want later on. Now let’s go find your bags,” he said.

“This is all I brought,” I said.

“Even better, let’s get out of here,” he said grinning.

I enjoyed the view of the beautiful multicolored buildings with prominent bay windows lit by the morning sun as Andy sped through the neighborhoods in his big purple Cadillac. I noticed that he was being quiet. Something was obviously on his mind.

He turned to me and said, “Travis, I never imagined I would ever be seeing you here. I guess there’s something you should know about me. Something that I’ve never told the rest of the family. It’s not easy for me to say this but,… I’m gay.” There was a long silence. I could tell Andy was nervous. “So, how do you feel about it Travis?”  

I turned to him and said, “It’s no big deal, so am I.”

Andy breathed a sigh of relief. “I was contemplating whether to hide all my posters and gay paraphernalia, but I had so much and just said, oh fuck it.” He smiled and gave me a light punch on my shoulder. “I had a feeling you might be gay back when you told me you hadn’t had sex with your fiance yet. Any horny straight boy would have fucked a girl like that already and you didn’t seem to be the pious religious type. But there was another reason Travis. I caught you checking me out,” he said.

“Was it that obvious?” I said biting my lip.

“Not to most people, but there were subtle hints. Your eyes lingered on me a bit too long. You also didn’t look too happy about the marriage. I noticed how awkward you looked when showing affection towards Kimberly. I was just like that myself. I’m going to show you the land of Oz after you get some sleep. You’re not in Kansas anymore,” he said grinning.

I woke up with a brilliant light shining through the window. Lying on a big comfy bed, I’d momentarily forgotten where I was. I’d been to San Francisco once many years ago. As I lay in bed, I tried to recall those past memories. I found the city to be both beautiful and a bit wild. It was known as the gay Mecca of the US. I’d requested leave for a week in June of 1987 and instead of tagging along with my army buddies to Las Vegas, I decided to visit to San Francisco. I told my friends that I was going there to meet family, but in reality I wanted to explore my sexuality. Gay bars and such places were strictly off limits to military personnel, but I was willing to take that chance of getting caught. Part of me was terrified, yet another was filled with a sense of excitement and wonder. I rented a motel room near the  Castro which was rumored to be the gay area of town. Packs of men lined the main drag on either side. I remember feeling uneasy and vulnerable walking past handsome men dressed in leather chaps and tank tops looking at me with lust in their eyes. It seemed like I was in an alternate universe.

I  noticed a dark building on the corner where men were entering a door held open by a really large muscle-bound biker guy dressed all in black. I hesitated at first, pretending to be looking at some books  displayed in a window. I gathered courage and followed some young men towards the unadorned door. The sign above the door said “Daddies.” The big biker guy at the door smiled and asked for my Driver’s license. He nodded and waved me through. I was shocked to feel him grabbing my ass as I squeezed past him. It was dark inside and filled with cigarette smoke and the smell of piss. I felt like a sheep among a pack of wolves. Their hungry eyes fixed upon me as I walked  up to the bar to buy a drink. I stood in a lone corner with my drink and one by one the guys would come by to chat me up. There was this one guy tall, hairy wearing jeans and shirtless except for a leather vest. He had a crew cut like me but wore a mustache. He sat down beside me and said, “You look nervous. I have never seen you here before.”

“You’re right, I am nervous. This is my first time in a gay bar.”

“Wow, you sure picked a fine bar for your first time. These guys will eat you alive. Most of these guys are into some hardcore shit.” I remember telling him that I was on leave from the army and that if I got caught, I could be dishonorably discharged from the army or worse. I was horny and was very attracted to this guy. We talked a while and he asked if I would like to go back to his apartment. I agreed, but was still feeling very nervous. We walked through the neighborhoods together. I felt open and vulnerable walking beside a guy dressed in traditional leather attire. It was a sure signal to everyone else that we were gay. I remember arriving at his apartment and we kissed and soon we had our clothes off in a sexual frenzy. He warned me to be careful, because this was the point that guys make the mistake of not being careful. He said to make sure that condoms were used and to make sure that drugs do not become part of the mix. Too many good men become HIV positive because of a simple lack of judgement at the right time. We spent one very passionate week together. I learned a lot about myself that week. It truly was the land of Oz.  

I put my clothes on and walked towards the kitchen. Andy was sitting at the table reading the paper and sipping on a cup of coffee.

“How did you sleep Travis? You hungry?”

“Good afternoon Andy. I slept like a log thanks. I’m a bit hungry.”

“I fixed you a grilled cheese sandwich and I have some vegetable soup on the stove.”  

I sat down and started to eat. I looked at Andy sitting across from me. He looked so much older than I remembered him. The dark hair was now replaced with a silver but he still had the same sexy smile.

“So how long have you lived here Andy? I had a big falling out with Mom and Dad over the wedding and joined the army and I never heard much about you since then,” I said munching on a piece of rye toast.

“Yeah, well that was a bit of a sore spot between your parents and me for a couple of years. But when I retired from the Navy in 1985, I got an apartment here in San Francisco and sorta been working in the landscaping business ever since. What about you Travis? You’ve been out of the army for a while now. What have you been doing?”

“I’ve been going from crap job to crap job, but since the accident, I’m not sure what’s going to happen…Andy if I tell you something, will you promise not to think I’m crazy.”

He started laughing, “That’s a pretty loaded question. I can’t promise something like that until I have heard it first, but go ahead. I think I can be a pretty open minded guy about most things. What’s on your mind?”

“After I had the accident and while I was lying in a coma for two weeks, I dreamed that was living this entire year differently,” I said as I felt something fuzzy brushing against my leg.

“Which year are you talking about?” he asked.

“This year, 2001. I woke up thinking I was living in March of 2002 in Kentucky, but instead I woke up in a hospital in Chicago. I have no recollection of being in that accident. It gets even stranger. The day of the supposed accident I got a letter telling me that you had died and left me a farm in Nicholas County Kentucky.”

Andy sat looking stunned and didn’t say anything. “Wow that really is a bizarre dream Travis. I don’t think it’s crazy to have strange dreams like that at all,” he said.

“Andy, it was more than a dream. At first I thought maybe it could’ve just been a dream until I started watching TV. I’ve been having strange deja vu moments. I’ve seen all the first run TV shows before. The news feels old to me. Not only that, but I’ve had dreams about you.”

“Now I am curious,” he said sipping his coffee.

“Well, I dreamed that you and a black man named Joe Riggs had both lived on this farm as a couple until you both died there.”

I noticed that Andy looked really pale and was covered with goosebumps. “What’s wrong uncle Andy?”

“I never ever told anyone in my family that I dated a black man named Joe Riggs. We met when I was in the navy and had talked about wanting to live together someday. We dated about a year, but he left me because I wasn’t serious about settling down,” he said.

“Well there is more. I also dreamed that I was a kid named Charlie Franklin. I woke up in his body one morning when you guys were in Elementary school. You were building some tree house. My mom called and when I rode home I got hit by a car and was paralyzed since then,” I said reaching down to pet a fat grey tabby cat rubbing against my leg.

“Well I can definitely say that part never happened. I did have a best friend named Charlie Franklin, but he was never in such an accident. In fact last I heard he was married with two kids living in Cincinnati Ohio,” he said looking down to see why I was bent over. “Oh I see you met my cat Otis. He is some stray that followed me home one day.”

“Hey Otis,” I said touching his poofy tail, but was surprised to get a quick smack with his paw before he ran from the room.

“He hates having his tail touched,” Andy said laughing.

“I guess I won’t do that again,” I said scrunching my nose. “Did you ever meet a man named Darrin Thomas?  Andy shook his head no. “Well I had another dream where I woke up as Darrin Thomas and was going on leave with friends to Bangkok in June of 1968. Darrin was attacked, stabbed outside of a brothel named the Black Orchid and would have bled to death had it not been for a young navy soldier named Andy McAllister. He was the man you bought the farm from.”

“That never happened either, but it is very odd. I seem to remember being in Bangkok that year. Travis this stuff you are telling me is way too strange and a bit upsetting. I’ve never heard anything quite like this before. Have you told anyone else about this?”

“I sorta tried to tell my best friend Dave and Dad, but they think it might be some sort of freak ESP thing. You didn’t tell your Dad the part about me did you?”

“Well not exactly, but I did tell him I thought you were gay.”

“Oh great! Now I’m going to have to hear about this from Debbie and Bubba,” he said rubbing his forehead.

“No, Dad was cool with it. After I told him that I was gay, he didn’t seem to mind that you might be gay also.”

His eyes got big. “I thought you might be gay back all those years ago, but I didn’t say anything. Why did you tell your Dad you thought I was gay?”  

“I didn’t mean to. I thought he already knew, plus I thought you were dead.”

“Now I’m very intrigued about this year that you lived before. But you know what? I think you should tell me more as I give you a walking tour of this most wonderful town.”

I took a hot shower and put on fresh clothes.  Andy was ready with his cargo shorts and hiking boots. We left his apartment and headed up the steep roads towards Corona park. There was a spectacular view overlooking the entire city. It was so windy that my eyes watered. I climbed on top of a little crag and Andy took my picture. Then we walked across the street to Buena Vista park. There were beautiful eucalyptus trees swaying in the breeze. We sat a while while I began my tale of Kentucky. Later we walked down and had lunch at some little deli in the Haight/Ashbury part of town. After lunch we started a long hike through the beautiful Golden Gate park and walked west towards the ocean. It was a very long walk through green grassy lawns, intricate sculptures and a plant conservatory. At the ocean there were two windmills. I thought it was cool. We walked on the windy beach a bit and then I looked up at the building high up overlooking the cliffs below.

“Wow, What is that place?”

“That is the Cliffhouse. Back in the early 1900s it looked like a castle until it burnt down. It was a very impressive place in the pictures,” he said.

I dug at a shell with my feet. The wind was very strong here. The crows were getting whipped about.

“I’m just dumbfounded by your story Travis. It’s too strange to wrap my mind around it.”

“What part’s too strange?”

“All of it actually. So you’re telling me that on September the 11th, terrorists will hijack planes and fly them into the Twin Towers at the World Trade Center and both of them will fall down, and then we’ll go to war? That just seems too bizarre to imagine. Then you tell me about ghosts, and that your best friend Ben was really Jesus? Travis you’re my nephew and I love you, but there aren’t many people in their right mind that would believe any of this. I mean it’s strange that you knew about Joe and the kid I went to school with, but it’s also possible someone could have told you about them. Don’t you think that maybe it’s possible that your mind fabricated all this while you were in that coma. People wake up from comas with strange tales all the time.”

“Yeah, maybe you’re right. It just felt so real.”

“Let’s not talk about this anymore today, Okay? How about we hike up there and I buy you a nice hot cup of clam chowder?”

I realized that what I told Andy sounded too bizarre, but his confirming that he dated a Joe Riggs convinced me even more. I also realized that Andy would probably think of me as a bit crazy. The rest of the day all we talked about was the army, our family, and all that was to be seen in San Francisco.

The next day Andy said he’d gotten tickets to some drag show. It wasn’t really my cup of tea, but I wanted to appear grateful for his effort to entertain me. We walked into some bar on Market Street. It looked like a regular bar, but with a little stage in the back and they had folding chairs set up to see the show. A series of tall Amazonian men with big Texas sized wigs, gaudy clothes, and way too much make-up took to the stage and lip synced to songs made popular by Madonna, Cher, and Whitney Houston. I must admit that they made me laugh. Gays can seriously turn out to be very funny clowns. Once the show was over, the chairs were put away and we were left to mingle and drink. I didn’t feel very comfortable having drag queens trying to flirt and hit up on me. They also didn’t take rejection very well. I also noticed that they drank way more than I could or would want to.

I was sitting alone waiting for Andy to come back when this big drunken drag queen with a big black wig and feathered boas sat down next to me. She batted her big Tammy Fae eyes at me and extended her arm for me to shake her hand.

“Hellooooo, I’m Miss Clair De Lune and who might this handsome hunk of man be?” she said.

“Travis,” I said feeling apprehensive.

“Oh so nice to meet you Trah’vis.” she said whipping her hair back.  She took a big gulp of her drink and then a big puff on her cigarette and cocked her head and blew the smoke sideways while she was staring at me. “So Mr Trah’vis, what would a handsome stud like you be doing here tonight? I bet you’re probably horny and looking for some fun, huh?” she said as she placed her hand on my leg and ran it up near my crotch.

I scooted away and said, “I’m here visiting my uncle.”

“Oh really? I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if we had a little fun, now would he?”

She got closer putting her hand closer to my crotch and whispered in my ear. “I can suck you so good that you’ll be screaming with joy.”

I pulled away. “No, no I’m sorry, but I’m just not interested.”

She sat back and said, “Not interested in sex, or not interested in me?”

“I’m not interested in having sex with you, sorry.”

“Oh please, don’t have pity on me. You’ve had your chance,” she said wagging her head. She staggered to her feet. “I’ll go find someone marvelous who appreciates someone as spectacular as me,” she said throwing her head back and raising her arms in the air.

Andy came walking back from the bar carrying two shot glasses and two mugs of beer.

“What was that all about? Did you insult Big Bird?”

I rolled my eyes and said, “ughhh.”

“I hope you like butterscotch liqueur,” he said downing his.

I downed the shot and said, “The show was pretty funny, but not too thrilled about being hit on by scary drag queens.”

“Oh yeah? So what type of guys are you interested in Travis?”

“Definitely not guys dressed as women.”

“I see… So you like a more masculine, muscular type of guy? Hmmmm, I know just the place. Let’s finish these beers and go.”

We left the bar and Andy led me down to a bar on Harrison street called the Lonestar. We walked through the door into a dark room. There was a beefy bearish guy with a hairy body wearing a harness checking IDs just inside. He gave Andy a big hug and then looked me over.

“Woof, who’s your cute friend here?”

“Dennis, this is my nephew Travis. He’s visiting me for a few days.”

“Well howdy Travis. Very nice to meet you.” He winked and reached out and felt my chest.

I wasn’t used to having guys doing that to me. I followed Andy into the dark bar. I looked about and caught the eyes of hungry wolves staring back at us as we approached the bar. An older bald fat bartender wearing bib overalls and a very long red beard looked up and growled.

“Howdy Andy what will you be having?”

“Hmmm think I’ll have a rum and coke and what would you like Travis?”

“A bud I guess.”

“So who’s your cute friend Andy?” Andy grabbed me around the shoulders. “This handsome young man is my nephew Travis. I’ve not seen this boy since he was a skinny eighteen year old kid. Now look at him, prime beef.”

I blushed and smiled. The bartender winked, reached out and pinched my nipple.

“Better watch out. The guys are gonna eat you up.”  

I grabbed the beer and we walked towards the pool table.  We sat down on a long wooden bench. At one end there sat a large barrel of peanuts. Guys walked by grabbing handfuls. I’d noticed that when people were finished, they would just toss the shells on the floor.

“Why do they do that?” I asked thinking it was rude.

Andy said it was supposedly good for the wood floors. Something about the oil of the shells. I thought it was odd.

I drank the beer rather quickly and bought a pitcher. Andy liked his rum and cokes. We were starting to get a bit wasted. He led me to the back patio and pulled out a pipe.

“Oh thank god! I haven’t had pot in ages. After Dad moved in with me, I was afraid to smoke in front of him and my friend Dave had to give up pot after he started dating Linda.”

Andy started to chuckle, “Well I’ll get you good and stoned then.”

We came back and sat by the pool table. I noticed that this short dark haired man with a crew cut and dark beard had sat down on our bench. His arms were covered with some sort of tribal tattoos. I was a bit intimidated being this close to a guy I had been eyeing across the room all night. The pot made me feel a bit paranoid. Every time the guy got up for his turn to shoot pool, he would brush past me closely rubbing his butt against my crotch then turning his head winking slyly as he looked back. I caught myself smiling at his glances. Andy whispered in my ear.

“I think that guy wants you.”

There was a feeling of fear and excitement rushing through me. The prospect of a sexual encounter was not something that I had planned for. Perhaps if I had gone to a bar alone or with friends my own age, but I was here with my uncle.

I turned to Andy and whispered, “I would feel weird about hooking up with a guy while I was visiting you.”

“Why do you think that?” Andy said shaking his head.

“Well because it would be sorta rude wouldn’t it?”

“When was the last time you had sex?” he asked.

I had to think about that. Either in this time line or the last, it had been well over six months or more. “It’s been ages,” I said with a sigh.

“Oh goodness Travis. I have sex all the time and look how old I am. This guy apparently wants you and I’ve been watching you drooling over him all night.” Andy got up and walked over to the hot guy playing pool and said, “My nephew there was just telling me that he thinks he can kick your ass at pool.”

He looked over and smiled, “Oh, he does, does he? Well tell him I’d like to see him try.”

Andy winked at me and said, “Get your name up on that board boy.”  

This guy was flirting very heavily now. He brushed past me and grabbed my crotch. Andy was laughing.

Suddenly I noticed Andy looking towards the door. “Be right back. I see my friend Monty. I suppose we are sorta dating on and off.”

I watched as Andy greeted this big black guy who was very muscular wearing a white tank top. He kissed him and gave him a big hug.

As I was watching, the cute guy looked at me and said, “Your next, stud. So you think you can kick my ass, huh?”

I laughed and said, “That was just my uncle talking. I haven’t played pool in ages.”

“Well let’s just see what you got then.” He reached out his hand to shake and said, “Name’s Max. What’s yours?”

“Travis.”

“Very pleased to meet you Travis.” He grabbed me in a big bear hug and then reached behind and felt my ass. “Mmmmm, nice.”

He smelled nice. I was getting a bit aroused and tried to adjust my growing erection so he wouldn’t notice.

Half way through the game I’d finished my pitcher of beer and was feeling a bit drunk. Each time Max had finished a shot he walked over to me and gave me a deep kiss and felt my ass. I’d been standing there with a throbbing erection for the longest time, but was so drunk that I didn’t care by this time. Andy had gone to the back room with his big black friend. Finally Max had made a shot and won the game.

“Good game, Max.”

“Oh yes it was.” He smiled and walked over to me grabbing me in an embrace, pulling me close and started kissing me deeply. As he was kissing me he tried to lay the cue against the wall, but it fell with a sharp whack on the floor. It shocked me for a second and I realized that the wolves were watching hungrily. I bent over and picked up the pool cue and placed it back on the rack. Max pulled off his shirt and began kissing me again pushing me against the wall. I felt his hard cock pressing against mine. I was breathing heavy. He then pulled off my shirt and I felt naked and vulnerable in front of all these men. His hand reached down into the front of my jeans and squeezed my rock hard cock.

“A big boy, huh?”

I let out a little moan as he squeezed. Things were getting a bit hot and passionate when the bartender confronted us.  

“Okay boys you put on a good show, but you either cool it down some or take it somewhere more private.”

I was shocked, maybe a bit embarrassed.

Max whispered in my ear. “I want you to fuck me good. You want to get out of here?”

I wanted him bad. I was beyond horny. “Yeah, just let me tell my uncle that I’m leaving so he won’t worry.” We walked to the back room and I saw Andy and his friend kissing. “Andy, uhh Max and I are going to…”

He nodded and waved. “Just come by sometime tomorrow. I’ll be home,” Andy said as we raced towards the door.

We stumbled down the street kissing and groping each other in the wee hours of the morning. He said he just lived a few blocks away. We reached his apartment building and we ran up his stairs, he was holding my hand pulling me behind him. The hallway had a creaky floor covered by an old dirty stained carpet with a  musky odor of mold and cat piss. The place was a bit of a dump. He quickly unlocked his door and we stumbled inside kissing each other. It was dark except for a light coming from his kitchen. It was a tiny apartment. We bumped past furniture with clothes piled up on his couch. We were already taking our clothes off before we made it to his bedroom. He pulled me onto his twin sized bed on top of him. Our hands groped each other in the darkness. Max had a compact, very lean muscular body covered in tattoos. From his chest to his groin was a medium covering of dark body hair. His cock was an average size but rock hard and to be expected for a young man in his twenties. He wore a leather cock ring that I found intriguing. Max was into pits. He buried his face in my underarms and immersed himself in masculine musk. We sucked each others cocks. I was consumed in the moment. Max stopped and started to kiss me again. He rolled himself around until he was on his back and pulled me on top of him. Breathing heavy, he gazed into my eyes with an intense animal urgency.

“Fuck me! Plow me good!” He raised his legs up and wrapped them around my waist pulling me into him. I was hard and excited. I could feel myself so close to entering him in this position. It entered my mind that we needed a condom.

“Do you have any condoms?” I asked.

He had a surprised look on his face. “No, I want you to breed me.”

I now started to wonder if Max did this sort of thing often. He seemed unconcerned with condoms and I started to wonder. Part of me wanted to just go for it. The thrill of Max being a dangerous man both scared and excited me. Suddenly I remembered that they were handing out packs of condoms and I had happened to put one in my pocket.

“Oh wait, I think I might have one in my pants pocket.”

I got off the bed and walked into the dark TV room and fumbled for my jeans. I found the condoms and walked back in. Max was still rock hard looking at me with hungry eyes. He had a bottle of lube ready in his hands. I didn’t ask his status. I found it easier to just assume that everyone was positive for HIV. He grabbed a small brown bottle and took a big sniff. He asked if I wanted some but I declined. I guessed that it was poppers. I had already assumed that Max was a bit dangerous and that made sex even more hot. I entered him and he ground into me like a beast.

“Fuck me, Travis, fuck me!”

I held him down and kissed him as I came closer to climax. I stiffened up and said I was close. I felt him gripping me. I felt myself letting out a series of grunts. Max was jerking himself and then we both shot. I collapsed on top of him. And we both just lay there. I could feel wet stickiness on my stomach. He reached for a towel and wiped us. He wanted to be held and spooned. I was the outer spoon and he the inner.

“Can you stay the night?” he said.

I nodded yes.

“Most guys just leave afterwards. You seem like a nice guy Travis.”

I lay there holding this young man in my arms. It seemed that this tough acting guy was used to lots of sex, but not much tenderness or love. We fell asleep, me spooning him.

The next morning I woke up feeling somewhat dehydrated and feeling hung over. Max was up cooking breakfast in his underwear. He was smiling and dancing around the tiny kitchen.

“I probably should get going. I’m here visiting my uncle and haven’t seen him in years,” I said.

I watched as his face fell. “At least have breakfast with me. I like you Travis.”

“Sure, I can do that.”

His smile returned. “Too bad you don’t live here. I’d like to see you again.” He walked over to me and kissed me. He was already hard again.

He cooked up some eggs, bacon and toast. As we sat and ate he told me that he was from some small town in Alabama. He had come out to his parents while he was in high school and they kicked him out saying they couldn’t have a gay son. I sensed a lot of sadness in this kid. He said he worked as a bar-back at some leather bar in the Castro. I found Max to be very lovable but also filled with darkness. Part of me wanted to stay, protect him, and have wild sex with him.

I took a shower, got dressed and there was a long goodbye kiss at the door which almost ended with us getting naked again. He wanted to exchange numbers, keep in contact. It was somewhat sad. I had guessed that most likely I would never see Max again and walked off on this bright sunny morning through the colorful city of San Francisco towards Andy’s apartment.

I stood next to the well manicured shrubbery beside Andy’s door. A older neighbor lady was out pulling weeds.

“Are you Travis? Andy stepped out and said if his nephew showed up to just walk on in. I’m guessing you must be Travis. I’m his neighbor Lottie.”

“Nice to meet you, Lottie. Where are you from? I detect an accent.”

“I’m from South Africa. My parents moved here over 40 years ago and I’ve lived in this apartment for the last fifteen years with my girlfriend Elsa. Andy’s been a good friend to us.” As I was chatting with Lottie, Andy pulled up in his car.

“I see you met my nephew, Travis.”

“Indeed I did.” she said.

“I went to fill the car up with gas. It’s been a while since I drove it. I usually walk everywhere in this town. I was thinking it would be sweet to drive up the coast and see Point Reyes.”

On the ride up the coast Andy asked  how it went with Max last night. I told him that I had a great time and that I thought Max was a sweet guy.

“I don’t know if he told you, but he’s HIV positive,” he said.

When I heard the words it scared me and made me squirm. I’d suspected it since he was willing to let me fuck him bare, but now the truth made it more real. I got quiet.

“You okay ,Travis? Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything. It wasn’t my place,” Andy said looking worried.

“He didn’t say anything, but I assumed he might be positive. We used condoms but we came close to not using them.”

“That is why so many guys have it. You don’t know how many times I fretted over my tests because of not using condoms. I’ve been very lucky at my age. We didn’t know about AIDS when I was younger and condoms were only used to keep from getting a girl pregnant,” Andy said. “I’m glad you guys had fun. Max is really a very nice guy.”

I asked Andy about the guy I saw him with last night. He said it was just a close friend named Monty and that they had messed around a few times.

The road wound over a rocky coast. Trees were shaped like bonsai by the constant wind and I saw pelicans flying low over the waves in formation.  Andy said that he had seen whales here before. The grassy hills looked orange and barren. When we reached the trail that led down to the lighthouse there was a fog pouring in. It was an alien look to the place. There was an uncomfortable silence between us as we walked down the steps.  Andy looked worried and his eyes were tearing up.

“Travis…I lied to you earlier. I said that Joe Riggs and I had only dated in the Navy, but it was more serious than that. Joe was my lover for over ten years. He was the love of my life, but he died of AIDs in 1995. I never told any of the family. It would have just been another reason not to want to talk. I was lucky that I didn’t get that horrible disease. It was the most painful thing watching Joe waste away to nothing. I was so shocked when you mentioned Joe’s name. I do believe you Travis. What you told me has been on my mind ever since yesterday. I didn’t want to believe. We were both atheists and I had accepted the idea that he was just gone. You’ve made me question my idea of the world and it makes me uncomfortable. Can you forgive me for not taking you more seriously?”  

“Yes Andy, I just didn’t want to think I was going crazy.”

His face was wet with tears as he opened his arms and gave me a big hug. “I decided to take you out to the lighthouse, because this is where Joe told me he loved me for the first time. It was our special place and where I spread his ashes just over the edge of that cliff. We stood for the longest time his arm draped over my shoulder staring off towards the blue horizon.